Today I had a conversation with my son that left me both devastated and frustrated. I know that he is just being a teen. I know that he is trying to exasperate me…and he succeeded.
My son has a diabetes clinic appointment coming up in a few days. Neither of us are excited by this event. We don’t really get a lot out of it and the wait times are crazy. He can’t wait until he doesn’t have to go anymore. I reminded him that he will always have to go to have prescriptions refilled, etc.He was not impressed. I have told him that I have to do the same thing but that does not appease him. We have been doing this since he was 2 and he wants to see an end date.
We discussed the fact that he had to attend his clinic appointments because he needed a doctor to sign off on his driver’s licence in the fall. I don’t know what exactly is involved in the licensing procedure but I am pretty sure that his doctor has to give him the okay. My son then asked if his licence would be restricted. I assumed it would, just as a person with glasses must wear glasses, someone using insulin will have to be using their insulin.
He was not completely appeased but was doing okay until a little later on. He was complaining about his being hot feet and stated that he should run around barefoot all of the time. I said that that may not be the best idea. He said it was fine for the Indians! I said that they were not running on insulin and he had to watch his feet.
That was the final straw for him. He asked why he should even bother to get out of bed in the morning? He would have to watch his feet for the rest of his life. He has to check his blood each time before he could drive. What is the point to any of it? If he was born years ago, they would have left him to die and maybe that was the right thing!
I wanted to cry (and still do). I wanted to scream–are you crazy!!!???? I almost lost you once! That is NOT the sort of talk I want to hear EVER!
I tried not to be mad. I tried to understand but I simply said, “Yep it sucks but that is your life and you will handle it.”
I know this is teen frustration. I know it will pass but he does scare me. When he does not have me around, he doesn’t bother to test. He swears he can tell if he is high or low and he just wings it. Yes, he probably can tell when he is running in range but the higher he runs himself the less sensitive he is and the more danger he skirts around. What will he do when he is on his own? The years are passing so quickly.
I have been sent an advanced copy of Moira McCarthy’s new book “Raising Teens with Diabetes”. Perhaps she will have some strategies to help me cope. I think I could use a few about now.